George W. Bush: Evil Genius?

Lots of people complain about W being incompetent, yet attribute amazing feats of governmental skill to him as well.

I often wonder WTF he’s thinking when he makes policy. We know Sharia law is anathema to our own values, yet we prop up so many countries with Sharia law as their basis of law that it boggles the mind. Hell, we even promote it, with both of the new governments of Afghanistan and Iraq basing their laws on Sharia. These Sharia examples lead me to wonder if W knows something we don’t know. I mean, how could he be THAT stupid?

Could it be that he knows that people under Sharia will get their asses handed to them and therefore force the populace to turn to another means of governance? Maybe, because it’s so backward, he knows that governments who base their law on Sharia will eventually collapse and will be forced to adopt trade with the West, leading to better ties and understanding and hopefully more eventual cessation of hostilities?

Is W an evil genius on the grand scale of Reagan, a la Phil Hartman on Saturday Night Live? I don’t think so, but one can hope.

Cracked.com Brings Teh Funneh

Cracked.com is usually right up my narrow alley of funny. An example:

Bullet Ant

Why you must fear it:
It’s a full inch long, it lives in trees and thus can and will fall on you to scare you away from its hive–the one you didn’t know was there, because it’s in a fucking tree. Before it does this, it shrieks at you. This ant, you see, can shriek.

It’s called a Bullet Ant because its ‘unusually severe’ sting feels like getting shot. On the Schmidt Sting Index, Bullet Ants rate as the number one most try-not-to-shit-out-your-spine painful in the entirety of the Kingdom Arthropoda.

Also–and we do feel the need to stress this–they fucking shriek at you before they attack.

My humorous predilections tend toward the crude and the bizarre, and Cracked.com offers up that strange mix of information porn with embarrassingly funny phrasing that tickles my inner evil demon. This is the way I would speak if I was a constantly drunk-off-my-ass Oscar Wilde… without the penis fetish.

I’m sure my mother weeps knowing I find “teh funneh” in such things.

More On Obama The Racist And Marxist (In His Own Words)

http://www.khow.com/pages/caplisreport.html

Thanks to Snapped Shot

And, of course, showing off his Marxist tendencies:

8. OBAMA SAYS WHITES ARE PHANTOMS TO BE EXPUNGED FROM DREAMS
 
“Questions of competition, decisions forced by a market economy and majoritarian rule; issues of power. It was this unyielding reality-that whites were not only phantoms to be expunged from our dreams but were an active and varied fact of our everyday lives-that finally explained how nationalism could thrive as an emotion and flounder as a program.” Pg 202

It’s that evil competition, market economy and majoritarian rule — a.k.a. free markets and democracy — that makes white people evil and leads to Nationalism.

Seriously, people like this guy? They want him to lead our country with this freakish attitude? WTF?!

Flobots - Handlebars (Obama’s Theme?)

Aussie Dave Gets Stupid

Aussie Dave, who writes the blog Israellycool.com, agrees with a commenter who says Richard Silverstein selling his children’s photos equals pedophilia.

“I am not stupid enough to suggest Richard Silverstein - as loathsome as his views and his treatment of people with whom he disagrees are - is a pedophile. But I do find it offputting that he would be offering for sale personal pictures - including those of his children - given the very real risk that pedophiles could purchase them.”

Wow, I didn’t know Aussie Dave was that stupid. So now all pictures of children are used for child molesting purposes? Better tell all those news outlets and magazines that use pictures of children to enhance a story about things involving children that they are just evil smut peddlers.

Aussie Dave is now flying the dumbass flag.

I don’t like Richard Silverstein’s positions, but his selling pictures of his kids — fully clothed, no less — does NOT equal pedophilia or any encouragement thereof.  Seriously, you have to be brain damaged to think like that, or agree with a position supporting that thesis. I hope it was just Aussie Dave being angry with Silverstein and therefore overreacting, because if this is actually Aussie Dave’s position, he just lost a lot of credibility.

Looking For A House In Lexington, Massachusetts?

Check out this one for sale.  Sweet.

58Hancock.com

Pregnant At 17? So What!

This Bristol Palin kerfuffle is lame. People who complain about teens getting pregnant are morons. We’re biologically set up to procreate early, especially so when the body encounters adequate amounts of fat during childhood. All this is a sign to the body that food is plentiful and more children can be had. “Early bloomers” are more prevalent now because of this.

We’re supposed to breed early and often. The teen years are probably the absolute best years to have a child because the body is at its best condition. Once the girls hit their mid twenties, it’s a downward slide until menopause in their 40s or 50s.

Me, I’m pro teen pregnancy because I prefer healthier children and more of them so America can keep up with the rest of the world populations. More kids equal more brains to find solutions to problems and keep America moving forward.

And yes, you can get pregnant too early, but I’ve read that it’s healthy to start as early as one year after menses begins. So girls, maybe wait two years and your body should be good to go.

Boys… well, you know the drill already. Do your thang.

Hot Chicks With Douchebags Saying

“Kristen makes holy spirit guides of the netherworld hump teddy bears like cracked up rhesus monkeys.”

HCwDB

My Ice Cream Maker

I got a sweet ice cream maker, the Cuisinart ICE-50BC. It’s pretty awesome except for a couple things… rather important things.

1. It’s loud as hell. I mean really, really super loud. I have to double the volume on my TV to hear it over the gnashing of the motors.

2. The instructions to put the top part together were lacking in direction. I had to bumble through them and figure it out on my own, eventually.

Otherwise it makes really good ice cream, and after a month of testing, I think I’ve got a solid base to work with (secret recipe, bitches!).

Van Halen - Ice Cream Man

My Grandma Kuchinski Has Died

Devout Catholic, mother of six children — Betty, Joseph Jr., Peter, Helen, Gerard (d. 1982) and John — wife of Joseph Kuchinski (d. 2000), Marguerite Kuchinski has passed away this evening, July 30th, 2008, at around 8:30 PM EDT, of congestive heart failure.

Born May 28th, 1923, she was 85 years old.

I love you, grandma. Thanks for being there.

Here’s the eulogy for Marguerite Kuchinski written by Helen Solomon:

Thank you all for being here and I’d especially like to thank John, Chris, Matthew and Joshua for driving from their Florida vacation including a 20 hour drive in one day arriving just this morning.

Many eulogizers take a broad brush to paint a picture that can be seen from afar. A big picture hopefully capturing the essence of the loved one’s life. I wanted to say something brief and true - something to capture the effect of my mother’s life on this world. . .but considering the complexity of her life it seemed not possible.

There’s so much I know about Marguerite but my thoughts kept settling on moments, scenes composed over the years that like poetry describe her with both brevity and truth.

-I remember our school clothes (six children!) were starched and ironed - and in those days there was no spray starch, just a time consuming and messy process using powdered starch and water.

-I remember six birthday parties a year with delicious cake and frosting made from scratch and delightful lily pad flower-shaped cups made from colorful napkins that were filled with Hershey’s kisses and M&Ms for each party guest.

-I remember praise over good grades that encouraged each of us to excel in school

-I remember my friend Miriam confiding in me that my mother talked to the turtles that Gerard brought home from the pond that we kept in the kitchen for a week or so. I thought that was okay – people talk to their pets – but then Miriam continued. . . and. . she said the turtles talked back to her by blowing bubbles. My mother was the first Turtle Whisperer.

-I remember her picking bunches of concord grapes from our yard and turning the kitchen into a grape jelly factory – what a gorgeous smell!

-I remember when Byron was little my mother kept a little plastic shoe-shaped piggy bank on the mantle in the kitchen of her house in Whitman that she and my father would fill with coins. Each time Byron came over he would go to the kitchen, climb on a chair, empty the bank then put it back. Every time he came over the bank was full, waiting for Byron and my mother’s delight at Byron happily collecting the coins.

-I remember her taking care of my children so Robbie and I could spend time together – I turned a blind eye to the sugary cereals she fed Sam when I wasn’t around after I found out - when Sam learned to talk – he was saying Apple Jacks, not apples.

-I remember when she was babysitting and the washing machine hose broke and water spilled all over the first floor. She told me that Sam, age 4, told her “My mother’s not going to like this.” She loved that.

These are just a few of my memories and I know that you have your own that convey what you love about her.

- I know that Frannie Brodie used to get cards with bingo numbers written inside (B41, I 50) as part of the message – I don’t know what that meant, but Frannie always laughs to tell that story.

-I know Frank Hayes can tell you about the spooky picture of Babe Ruth she had in her window when the Red Sox broke the curse

-I know that she was very active in the church and led rosary in the last several years with a group of people who self organized and kept things running smoothly

I hope you will share your memories of Marguerite with me and each other. I know she would love to see us all here, gathered to acknowledge that she was loved and I know that she loved us.

*sigh* Snapped Shot Again

Yeah, you guessed it, another comment spam-filtered:

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Brian pays me $10,000 per Photoshop of Ahmadinejad, and I have to pay for my crack addiction, so I won’t give it up. lol

Mandating clothes means punishment for not wearing clothes, hence jail time for being naked. So by doing something that doesn’t cause physical harm, people without clothes are punished with physical harm (jail, assault, rape) under the legal guise of preventing them from being physically harmed by those who would assault and/or rape them. Uncool.

Also, if plain nudity can be redefined as pornography, then any kind of skin-baring can be redefined as something more sexualized. For example, breast feeding, which involves baring the female breast and allowing a minor child to put its mouth on it can be child molestation. Yes, it’s the wrong definition, but that’s my point: you can’t redefine nudity to mean pornography.